It happens every single time I sit down for an initial consultation with a couple. The groom sits back and says, “I don’t care. I just want her to be happy. Just tell me where and what time to show up.” I nod my head, smile, and continue speaking with the bride, knowing that all to soon his opinions will make their grand entrance.

10 months before wedding, Invitation meeting
“I don’t like those curvy things. Nothing too fancy. The people are going to throw it away. No, I don’t want pictures on the Save the Dates. Honey, Do we even have to take engagement pictures?”

8 months before wedding, Catering meeting
“My guys don’t do fruity drinks. We need beer. Make sure there is lots of scotch and tequila. What’s the standard bar again? Oh no, I only drink Grey Goose. Let’s upgrade to the premium bar.”

6 months before the wedding, Floral meeting
“Boutonnieres? I am not wearing flowers. I might wear that pocket square in a non-girly color. I was thinking…how about if my guys and I wear sneakers?”

4 months before the wedding, Transportation meeting
“I am not showing up to MY wedding in a lame car. Let’s get a stretch hummer or a party bus. How much to rent a Lamborghini for the day?”

2 months before wedding, Rehearsal dinner planning
“Let’s do dinner earlier. My friends that couldn’t make it to my bachelor party want to take me out.”

Day before the wedding
“Don’t worry Joan. I will not be out that late and I won’t get drunk. I forgot to get hair spray and black socks for tomorrow. Can you get those for me?”

Morning of wedding
“Joaaaaann, can you bring us some beer and Red Bulls. We are all hungover. Do you know how to tie this? I also lost the cufflinks and button things. What time are pictures again?”

And after I sober him up and send him down the aisle, I smile and think how I am going to miss my very opinionated, high-maintenance client, which is almost always the one in the tux, not the one in the gown.

(This post is dedicated to all my fabulous grooms. You keep my job interesting and fun)